Tisha B’Av: What Are We Really Mourning?
Rabbanit Sara Krengel
Former shlicha in Johannesburg (2002 – 2003)
Proud mother of Chedva,Torah MiTzion shlicha in Melbourne.
Currently teaches multiple subjects, including Jewish Philosophy, Tefilla, and Taharat HaMishpacha. She runs Seminars and Tours of the Mikveh.
Click for PDF For translation to Spanish and Português
One of the most commonly discussed issues that I hear every year at this time, is whether we truly understand and relate to the loss of the Beit HaMikdash. After all, many say, it was thousands of years ago and we never experienced it, so how can we truly feel and relate to the loss of something that we never had? One Rabbi went as far as to say that we are fooling ourselves – we don’t really mourn the Beit HaMikdash, only the great tzaddikim ever felt its loss. Respectfully, I disagree. I think we are all mourning the Beit HaMikdash in our own way. The question is: What does that look like today?
In order to answer that, we have to look at what the Beit HaMikdash represents, how its loss has affected the world and what its rebuilding means to us. Much of the focus when discussing and studying the Beit HaMikdash is on the Avodah, the Korbanot and the structure itself. But we know that the Beit HaMikdash represents something far greater than the technical details. It is our connection with Hashem: “וְעָשׂוּ לִי מִקְדָּשׁ, וְשָׁכַנְתִּי בְּתוֹכָם” – “And they shall make Me a sanctuary and I will dwell in their midst” (Shemot 25:8).
The Alshich expounds upon this and writes:
“בשום לב אל אומרו ושכנתי בתוכם ולא אמר בתוכו. והוא כי הנה שמעתי לומדים מכאן כי עיקר השראת שכינה באדם הוא ולא בבית מאומרו בתוכם” –
“If you look closely at the wording, it says: ‘dwell within them’ and not within it (the Beit HaMikdash). From here we learn that the essence of Hashem’s dwelling is within man himself and not within the Beit HaMikdash.”
Unlike Rashi who comments on this verse: “ועשו לשמי בית קדושה”- that we are building a “Holy Home” for Hashem’s Name i.e. for His sake so that He will have a place to dwell; the Alshich clearly makes it about us. That is to say, that Hashem wishes to dwell within each one of us and thus the Beit HaMikdash is the means to that end. It’s not about the building, it’s about the people.
Hence the Sefer Chareidim writes:
” בתוך לבבי משכן אבנה לזיוו, קרבן אקריב לו נפשי היחידה” –
“Within my heart I will build a Tabernacle/Sanctuary for Hashem’s Glory, and I will offer Him my only soul as a korban/sacrifice” (which Rav Hutner later expounded upon and Rav Shmuel Brazil made into the famous song: ‘בלבבי משכן אבנה’).
Thus, we are not simply mourning the physical loss of the Beit HaMikdash on Tisha B’Av, but rather the severing of our connection and closeness with Hashem throughout the last 2000 years of exile. We are mourning our failure to live up to the standard of Hashem dwelling closely and permanently within each one of us. That is something I believe we can all relate to and feel deeply. These past three years of war in Israel and the anti-Semitism around the world have shown us deeply just how close and yet how far we are from this ideal. There have been countless acts of chessed, love, connection, spirituality, bravery and sacrifice in Am Yisrael. And yet, if every single one of us; every Jew – religious and non-religious alike, and the entire world, would live up to the ideal of Godliness and Holiness, the whole world would look so different. I think mourning the loss of that ideal world, and the yearning for it to return, is something we can all identify with. I also think that mirrors the secret as to why Tisha B’Av is both a day of mourning and a future day of rejoicing. I even remember a soldier asking me once how he could explain Tisha B’Av to his fellow soldiers who had no knowledge of its meaning. I replied that I was sure they could all relate to the idea of a world where people live in harmony with themselves and with others. A world filled with Godliness, dignity, goodness, love and peace. That is what we mourn and daven for.
I believe that is why the Gemara (Shabbat 31a) states that yearning for the Geulah – the redemption, is such a fundamental pillar of our lives:
וְהָיָה֙ אֱמוּנַ֣ת עִתֶּ֔יךָ חֹ֥סֶן יְשׁוּעֹ֖ת חׇכְמַ֣ת וָדָ֑עַת יִרְאַ֥ת ה’ הִ֥יא אוֹצָרֽוֹ׃ )ישעיהו לג:ו):…
אָמַר רָבָא: בְּשָׁעָה שֶׁמַּכְנִיסִין אָדָם לְדִין, אוֹמְרִים לוֹ: נָשָׂאתָ וְנָתַתָּ בָּאֱמוּנָה? קָבַעְתָּ עִתִּים לַתּוֹרָה? עָסַקְתָּ בִּפְרִיָּה וּרְבִיָּה? צִפִּיתָ לִישׁוּעָה? פִּלְפַּלְתָּ בְּחׇכְמָה? הֵבַנְתָּ דָּבָר מִתּוֹךְ דָּבָר? וַאֲפִילּוּ הָכִי, אִי יִרְאַת ה׳ הִיא אוֹצָרוֹ — אִין, אִי לָא — לָא.
The faith of your times will be the strength of your salvation, wisdom and knowledge; fear of Hashem – that is man’s treasure (Yeshayahu 33:6)… Based on this verse, Rava said: When a person is brought to judgment for the life that he lived in this world (after he departs from it), they ask him: Did you conduct business faithfully? Did you designate times for Torah study? Did you engage in procreation? Did you await salvation? Did you engage in the dialectics of wisdom? Did you glean insights from one matter to another? And, even if he did all these, if the fear of Hashem is his treasure then he is found worthy, and if not, none of these accomplishments have any value.
Among the six things we will be asked when we get to shamayim/Heaven is: “Did you await the Final Redemption”? Were you yearning for Mashiach, for Ge’ulah, for the Beit HaMikdash? Did you anticipate and eagerly await salvation? Part of that question includes mourning the loss and absence of it. That is what we are mourning and davening for on Tisha B’Av – for God’s Presence to be felt in our hearts and in the world. That is why the Gemara concludes with the fear of Heaven, because that is the connection to Hashem that ties everything together. That is our hope and our strength.
As Rashi says on the above passuk:
אמונת עיתך- את שהאמנת בהקב”ה בעתים שעברו עליך וצפית לישועה תהיה לך לחוסן
Faith of your times: The fact that you believed in Hashem, the Holy One Blessed be He, in times of trouble and you awaited and hoped for His salvation, that itself will be your strength.
I often like to quote the Gemara (Berachot 33b), which also quotes the verse above:
וְאָמַר רַבִּי חֲנִינָא: הַכֹּל בִּידֵי שָׁמַיִם, חוּץ מִיִּרְאַת שָׁמַיִם. שֶׁנֶּאֱמַר: ״וְעַתָּה יִשְׂרָאֵל מָה ה׳ אֱלֹהֶיךָ שׁוֹאֵל מֵעִמָּךְ כִּי אִם לְיִרְאָה״… אֵין לוֹ לְהַקָּדוֹשׁ בָּרוּךְ הוּא בְּבֵית גְּנָזָיו אֶלָּא אוֹצָר שֶׁל יִרְאַת שָׁמַיִם, שֶׁנֶּאֱמַר ״יִרְאַת ה׳ הִיא אוֹצָרוֹ״.
And Rabbi Chanina said: Everything is in the hands of Heaven, except for fear of Heaven (Man has free will to serve God or not) as it is stated: “And now Israel, what does the Lord your God ask of you other than to fear Him, to walk in all of His ways, to love Him and to serve Him with all your heart…”(Devarim 10:12)… The Holy One, Blessed be He, has nothing in his treasury other than a treasure of fear of Heaven, as it is stated: “Fear of the Lord is his treasure” (Yeshayahu 33:6).”
Hashem values and treasures fear of Heaven above all else.
I always end this teaching with a thought of my own, which actually brings me back to my original question: If we know that Hashem controls everything except for our faith and fear of Heaven, and I think we have been shown this time and again these past three years; and if the very thing that we are mourning on Tisha B’Av – that loss of closeness and connection to Hashem – is actually the very thing that gives us our strength and brings about the salvation, then that is exactly what we need to work on and strengthen. The good news is that despite all the mourning and tragedies throughout this long and painful exile, we always know that our story, the story of Am Yisrael, has a very happy ending! May the Final Ge’ulah, the rebuilding of the Beit HaMikdash and peace come speedily in our days!
I’d like to dedicate this Dvar Torah to my beloved nephew Yakir Hexter HY’D, who fell in battle in Gaza in January, 2024. He was a true example of bringing Hashem into the world in everything that he did. Yehi Zichro Baruch.
For comments: saraelkr@gmail.com
